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Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Pastoral Panoramic Ponderings ~ Helping the Traumatized Grow in Their Place


          This morning, the primary focus of my time with God was on what it means to, “count others more significant than yourselves.”[1] What kept coming to mind is the way that people traumatized by abuse would hear this in their sark (flesh). While the thoughts and feelings of traumatized people are extremely important, the church must accept this emphasis, that the negative ways people interpret what it means to count others more significant than ourselves are coming from the sark. It is a matter of the flesh recoiling from things it knows have happened, but with no spiritual ability to know how to do what is righteous.
          Right after the things Paul said in Philippians 2:3-4, he writes, “Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus” (vs 5). When we think of the “mind” that controls our behavior, there are only two minds, the mind of the flesh, and the mind that is “yours in Christ Jesus.” If we use the mind of the flesh to figure out what to do about the painful experiences of life, we will always get fleshly, sarky results. Our ideas will always fall short of what we would have believed, or done, if we had related to the will of God in the Holy Spirit. And yes, absolutely broken people can cry out to God in utter dependence on the Holy Spirit to do all that God’s word has promised them.
          The thing that traumatized children of God need to know is that, if we have been born again by faith in Jesus Christ, we have been given a new mind, “the mind of Christ.”[2] It is not that having this mind immediately causes the feeling of trauma to go away. It is that we now have a new mind by which we are able to process trauma differently than what the old mind was able to do.
          So, on one side, we must consider that we have the mind of Christ, this mind that is ours in Christ Jesus. On the other side, we must continue to remind ourselves that it is the church that has this mind. The traumatized among us do not try to deal with the trauma of abuse alone, as if each one of us has this mind of Christ, and now we are all expected to work on our “stuff” on our own, saving the rest of the body of Christ the work of having to help us.
          The reality is that the body of Christ has the mind of Christ, and the mixture of people in the church, at all different levels of maturity, stirs up the mature to set the example for the weak, so that we are always dealing with things together.
          What is sad is that, in many churches, instead of the mature setting the stage for the weak to get help and healing for their trauma, those considered mature, the “pillars” of the church, are often very immature people who have simply found a way to control the playground, so to speak. They have developed safe roles where people look up to them as the good Christians in the church, and so they feel safe to lead the way, and control what the church is like.
          However, these people are not mature, and are not operating out of the mind of Christ. They are both immature, and sarky (fleshly). Because of this, and because the role they are playing hides the truth about their soul-condition, they live in constant fear of being exposed. They cannot have a church that helps people with trauma, and uncovers the ugly memories of abuse so that people can experience the “comfort of love”[3] from God and his people. If they allowed such a thing as Spirit-led ministry to traumatized brothers and sisters, it could expose the way they have been operating out of the sark, rather than out of the Spirit. Everyone would see that their “I’m a good Christian,” role was “selfish ambition and conceit,”[4] rather than an example of Christ-centered, Spirit-dependent faith.
          The thing that must encourage us from God’s word is that he has provided for us in Jesus Christ so that we do have the mind of Christ, and there is a mind that is “yours” (meaning the corporate church), and we find our hope and help by facing trauma together.
          What this should look like is that the whole church is influenced primarily by the most mature members, the elders who have both the maturity to show what it looks like to grow up in Christ, and the position of leadership that gives them the approval of the church to lead the way. Paul has written a beautiful description of what this looks like in Ephesians 4:11-16.
          In a church where the leaders are equipping the saints for the work of ministry,[5] and the church is doing ministry to build up the body of Christ,[6]the church keeps growing toward “mature manhood, to the measure of the stature of the fullness of Christ.”[7]It is the maturing church, “speaking the truth in love,” that helps us “to grow up in every way into him who is the head, into Christ.”[8]
          “Speaking the truth in love” comes from the new mind of the church. This does not mean that everyone in the church knows how to speak the truth in love, but that the leaders are leading, the people are serving one another in love, and the church in its maturing journey encourages one another with the wisdom that is from God,[9] so that everyone in the church grows up together.
          This means that the immature, and those broken by abuse, and the ones who are shattered with terrible nightmares, come to the church so that the whole church can speak truth to one another. We bring the things we are reading in the word so that we can lovingly affirm the truths that God is speaking to us. We can speak those truths to one another. We can remind each other repeatedly what God has said, and how he has revealed his love, and how we are in this together as his body, and how we have the mind of Christ.
          When we work together as the church so that we are growing up “into Christ… the whole body, joined and held together by every joint with which it is equipped, when each part is working properly, makes the body grow so that it builds itself up in love.”[10]
          Now, what if when we heard, “when each part is working properly,” we did not interpret this as “each part is in perfect operating condition”? What if, instead of adding a sarky meaning to this (that we all better get our act together so that we are the good Christians we are supposed to be), we saw the body’s working properly as each part yielding to the mind of Christ about how we are doing right now, and seeking what he would do for us through his body, rather than what we can do for ourselves through sarky self-protection?
          In other words, there is a way that everyone can be “working properly” by showing up in poverty of spirit about how we are doing; letting the Spirit lead us to mourn the condition of our souls, both the sin that is there, and the mess that other people’s sins have made inside us; humbling ourselves in the meekness that can identify that the specific things we are struggling with, the memories that are overwhelming us, the nightmares and panic attacks, cannot be fixed by any of our own self-dependent efforts; and so we come from where we are, hungering and thirsting for the righteousness Jesus Christ would bring to our inner being through our faith, not through our trying to do good works.[11]
          What I’m trying to say is that the “in humility count others more significant than yourselves,” part of the picture does not mean that we deny how we are doing, or suppress our real soul-condition because we don’t want to bother anyone. It doesn’t mean that every single person in the church is able to stop and look around to grasp the full impact of how every other part of the body is doing.
          Rather, it is describing the way of life of the church where the mature lead in counting the rest of the church family as more significant than themselves, so they can lead the way in teaching the church how to do ministry to each other. As the leaders bring all the people together, and teach them to come as they are, not as they believe they need to pretend to be, the most broken people who show up and say, “help me please” are just as much “working properly” the way an injured member of the body should be working to get better, as the healthiest are working properly in using their gifts and love to build up the body of Christ.  
          The problem is that broken people might experience a sarky feeling of guilt that they are a burden to the church and shouldn’t bother anyone with their troubles. Because there is a call for each part to do their part, the broken parts might think they need to try really hard to help out while in their wounded and broken condition. After all, running a program shouldn’t be too hard. It is kind of encouraging to get the sense of approval that comes from making a contribution, right?
          However, to participate in the church that way, broken people need to rely on self. Their ambition to help while wounded is a self-based ambition. Their aim to deny to anyone that they are wounded, while putting on a mask that appears to be doing all the right things, is a self-dependent way of living. It is self-protection trying to avoid further pain. And, because it is the sark, the flesh, trying to figure things out, it will always choose the wrong way of trying to live out what it hears from God’s word.
          On the other hand, when people come to God in their brokenness, and realize that God’s work is done through the church, and that experiencing healing is the best thing they could do for everyone, they can then admit how poorly they are doing, contribute their part to the growth and maturity of the church by undergoing whatever ministry they need for their freedom, so that, as they heal, the church grows stronger and builds itself up in love.
          I share this only to point out that contributing our “part” to the growth of the church doesn’t mean showing up to help run programs. Neither does it mean trying to be strong, or pretending to be okay. The way that broken, wounded, traumatized members of the body of Christ do their part is by receiving the ministry freely, without resistance, without arguing and complaining, and so experience the healing and freedom in them that helps the body get stronger and healthier.
          There is a sense in which I would apply this exhortation to pastors and churches to the place of the traumatized members of the body of Christ. “Obey your leaders and submit to them, for they are keeping watch over your souls, as those who will have to give an account. Let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.”[12]Notice that the leaders, the team of elders shepherding the church, are “keeping watch over your souls.” Jesus came to give rest to our souls,[13] and the elders watch over our souls to make sure our souls are receiving all the ministry of Christ through his church.
          The church submits to the band of elders who watch over the flock, but with this particular quality, that the congregation, “let them do this with joy and not with groaning, for that would be of no advantage to you.” Speaking as a leader, I have never felt “groaning” just because some members of the congregation are severely wounded and need the special care and attention of the body of Christ. What causes frustration and sadness is not that people need a lot of ministry.
          What causes a pastoral struggle is when ministry is repeatedly offered to people who won’t take it, and so they stay the same month after month, year after year, never getting better, never growing stronger, never having the freedom to build up the rest of the body in love. Even though it might sound noble to believe they are doing it so as not to trouble the church, that only shows they are listening to their sark, their flesh, which doesn’t ever get it right because it cannot understand spiritual things. They are causing trouble to the church, not by trying to avoid being a burden, but by holding back their place in the body from the life of the Spirit that would first glorify God with their healing, and then glorify God by their participation in ministry.
          I’m not sure if such a short look at how traumatized believers can help the church by showing up to receive ministry can actually make the issue clear enough to help. I hope that this at least whets the appetite for broken people to see how they can contribute to the church by receiving help, letting people freely, lovingly, and joyfully minister to them, experience healing and freedom through the Spirit’s work in the body, and so grow up with the church to participate in the things that God is doing.
          If nothing else, broken people need to realize that their self-protection fits the description of selfish ambition. Resisting the work of the Spirit for their healing fits the description of conceit (thinking they are of greater importance than the Holy Spirit). Avoiding the ministry offered to them is really looking out for their own interests. If these things were acknowledged, there could then be some humble repenting of this self-reliance. Broken people could count the leaders and helpers in the church as more significant than their self-protective thoughts and feelings. They could look to the interests of those seeking to do ministry in the church because those people are seeking the interest of the wounded. They could trust God that he has given them people who have both the maturity, and the spirituality, to do ministry in the Spirit instead of in the sark.
          I am very aware of the failures of churches and pastors. However, I have operated for at least two decades in the growing and maturing belief that if God’s word tells me how things should be done, I can step out in faith to do his will today knowing that he will have the right people coming together at just the right time. I have seen this happen in personal reconciliation with people, in people finding others ready to help them at just the right time, and groups of people opening up to the work of God together so that all were growing up in Christ even though it appeared to be a hodge-podge of needs, maturity-levels, abilities, gifts, and ideas of what was going on. There is a way that we can have the mind of Christ, which includes coming to Jesus to give rest for our souls even while he is working in others to surrender to him as he uses their lives to help others find his rest.
          All that to say, be honest about where you are right now, pray earnestly to know what God is doing in you to will and to work for his good pleasure, and go work that out in obedient faith with fear and trembling, trusting that God is also working in the whole body of Christ to will and to work things in his good pleasure that will match all the work he is doing in you. [14]
          While everything you need is found in Christ, he gives you what you need through his body, the church. Come to him by gathering with people in your church who will pray for the fullest experience of these things God’s word reveals. God will certainly answer such a prayer that cries out for the experience of what he himself has breathed-out into his written word.
“And this is the confidence that we have toward him, that if we ask anything according to his will he hears us. And if we know that he hears us in whatever we ask, we know that we have the requests that we have asked of him.”[15]

© 2015 Monte Vigh ~ Box 517, Merritt, BC, V1K 1B8 ~ in2freedom@gmail.com
Unless otherwise noted, Scriptures are from the English Standard Version (The Holy Bible, English Standard Version Copyright © 2001 by Crossway Bibles, a division of Good News Publishers.)





[1] Philippians 2:3
[2] I Corinthians 2:16
[3] Philippians 2:1-2, reminding us that God brings up bad memories that have never experienced comfort because love seeks to comfort the heart that has experienced the trauma those experiences have caused.
[4] Philippians 2:3
[5] Ephesians 4:12
[6] Ephesians 4:12
[7] Ephesians 4:13
[8] Ephesians 4:15
[9] James 3:13-18 contrasts the wisdom that comes “from above” with the wisdom of the world, the flesh, and the devil, that causes the selfish ambition and conceit Paul was talking about. The wisdom from above will lead the church in its fellowship of caring for those who are still in need of comfort from the traumas of life.
[10] Ephesians 4:16
[11] Based on the Beatitudes of Matthew 5:1-12
[12] Hebrews 13:17
[13] Matthew 11:28-30
[14] Philippians 2:12-13
[15] I John 5:14-15

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